How to cheer up your neighbor: encouraging phrases for all occasions. Cool phrases, funny sayings
How are cool expressions and phrases useful? For any occasion in life, some people always have jokes, jokes, sayings that can help others. A witty, ironic, cheerful person endures adversity more easily and will not be at a loss for words.
Reality sometimes presents not the most pleasant surprises. Overload at the workplace, stressful situations in your own home, uncertainty about friends, work colleagues, and the future in general often leads to a breakdown. It goes without saying that at such moments my soul is just scratching like cats. What to do in such turbulent times?
What will help relieve stress?
Many people, finding themselves victims of unexpected pressure, try to seek, if not oblivion, then recharge, in the regular use of various stimulants. Moreover, some of them begin to support themselves with relatively safe energy drinks, and end their lives as avid drug addicts.
Even our favorite tea is one of these energy drinks. It is known that tea can lift your spirits for no apparent reason. However, over time, this can lead to true chemical dependence. Therefore, it is much better to relieve stress by remembering and using cool expressions for any occasion.
Will humor and jokes help cope with stress?
Jokes and gags that are appropriate to the situation can improve your mood and relieve stress without any additional chemical doping. It is for this reason that the article is devoted to humorous expressions applicable in a variety of life situations .
By reading it, you will not only improve your mood here and now. By remembering some of these expressions, you can cheer yourself up whenever the need arises. Moreover, such a beneficial effect will have virtually no side effects.
The main thing here is not to overdo it when communicating with people who do not understand humor. After all, some can condemn even the most innocent joke, and light sarcasm for them is like a personal insult!
When can funny expressions about life be used in speech?
If you can't change the situation, change your attitude towards it. This is the cultivation of positive character traits that help you move through life easier, quickly find new friends and help old ones. Cool expressions filled with subtle humor will help defuse the situation in almost any situation. They can be used both when something went wrong and when the heart is filled with joy. The most important thing is that the interlocutor is on the same emotional wavelength with you. If this condition is met, neither you nor your listeners will be bored.
Examples of the coolest expressions about family life
In this block you will find the most famous funny expressions that can be used when communicating with family members. It is especially recommended that the male half study this block: do not forget that women love witty people. Introducing our TOP 10:
- Marital ties are a difficult matter, so they are usually carried out by two people, and sometimes by three people.
- Lover from his first marriage.
- A woman’s naivety: even watching porn films, she hopes that sex will end in marriage.
- A declaration of love is like a signal of the exact time. It is true only at the moment of utterance.
- My trembling half.
- You and I are of the same blood - you are Chuk, I am Gek.
- When it’s raining and sad outside, nag your husband - create an atmosphere of comfort.
- It's better to be jealous of a woman's stove than her computer.
- My children are concerned about where everything came from, and I am concerned about where everything went.
- Happiness is when the desired moments coincide with the inevitable ones.
- A strong marriage is a humble husband and wife who treats him like a king.
Cool expressions on vacation
To fill your holiday with smiles and fun, you can use almost any jokes and gags. The most suitable ones would be funny expressions from films. If none come to mind, remember something from the following TOP:
- One drop of nicotine will kill a horse, three hundred can kill
- A quickly drunk glass cannot be considered full.
- Today you don’t drink with us, but tomorrow you will betray your Motherland.
- Eat, be full, dear guests. If you have completely lost your conscience, then you can come tomorrow.
- Smart people are nice to talk to, but difficult to work with.
- My life is passing away so quickly, as if she is no longer interested in me.
- There are no ugly women - there are underfunded ones.
- To make a woman happy, sometimes allow her to do nothing.
- A person who values life will not distort it with dirty thoughts.
- Monogamous will make only one person unhappy.
and expressions appropriate in line to see a doctor
Are you going to see the doctor again? Don't despair! Our coolest expressions, presented in the following TOP, can make a visit to the doctor easy and fun:
- Visit the website of the dental clinic - www.zubov.net.
- One head is already good, but the body will also come in handy.
- The patient refused an autopsy, so the doctor was forced to treat him.
- The doctor cannot prolong life, so he prolongs the disease.
- The doctor asks the patient with a knife in his back: “Are you in a lot of pain?” - No, it only gets unpleasant when I laugh.
- Medicines are so expensive that as long as you earn money on them, time will heal.
- New version of the Hippocratic oath: only upon presentation of an insurance policy...
- This is what our Predictions suffered.
- The more free the healthcare, the more expensive the medicines.
- It was a beautiful leg... Give me the second one!
Cool expressions to use during a quarrel
Of course, quarrels are not the most pleasant thing. But even they can be made less painful if you learn to “send away” people you don’t like more or less beautifully. Below is the next TOP, in which you will find expressions with meaning, cool insults to cultural people:
- How much will the principles be on your exchange today?
- Of course, everyone wants to be honest... But they want to be rich more.
- Yes, it’s high time to weed your head.
- Grunting is the new sign of agreement!
- There are simply no unbearable people, there are only narrow doors.
- Who made such a face at you?
- Let it be rubbish. But take as much as you want!
- I noticed by your alarm clock’s face that you’re getting ready to ring again.
- There is no need to stage thoughts here.
- And I don’t want to live, and I’m too lazy to shoot myself.
Cool expressions about gray everyday life
Cool expressions about life are an opportunity to brighten up gray everyday life. Want to see this for yourself? Read the following TOP:
- Soon they will start imprisoning all the malicious bribe defaulters.
- Don't smile at me like a tax inspector.
- I'm having more and more prophetic nightmares.
- To be completely happy, I want to survive.
- The 112 service received another call. The rescuers were upset, but decided not to pick up the phone.
- If a bald spot is a path trampled by thoughts, then I am the most thinking person!
- Some people even hate New Year. Well, for example, Christmas trees.
- To eat so much, you will have to eat.
- If you are always surrounded by fools, then you are the most important of them.
- I’d rather be covered in sweat seven times than frost once.
Cool expressions used instead of insults
There are people to whom you can explain it 1000 times, repeat it - it’s all useless! However, even in this case, you should not despair and be sad. After all, cool expressions for communicating with an unpleasant interlocutor can be suitable in slippery situations. Communication with “especially gifted” people is no exception. To find out how to point out to such people the stupidity of their situation, remember a few expressions from the following TOP:
- Sewerage is the only thing that can unite you and me.
- I see you are smart! I see that the skull is too tight. I can fix it.
- Smile wider, the boss needs more idiots.
- Don't make me nervous! I already have nowhere to hide corpses!
- There is only one hero. When there are many heroes, they are called hooligans.
- I see that soon someone will get away with a slight fright.
- You won't have to wait long for a warning shot to the head.
- Be careful, take care of yourself, don't let your brain think.
- If I get up, I'm afraid nuclear war will ruin such a wonderful day for you.
- More and more often I feel an irresistible desire to obscenely admire your behavior.
Cool expressions to help you admit your mistake
Oddly enough, funny ones can smooth out the situation when you don’t want to laugh at all. One of these situations is the need to admit your own mistakes. To find out what you can say in such an inconvenient case, check out the next TOP:
- The source of my wisdom is my experience. The source of my experience is my stupidity.
- There are people who don’t make mistakes, which means they are simply afraid to act.
- Our delusions will die before us, so there is no need to make a mummy out of them.
- Experience is a thing that you get instead of what you wanted.
- Experience is a thing that appears immediately after it was needed.
- I won’t try to explain anything in between slaps. And it will turn out unclear, and you will have to repeat it.
- Why commit the sin of despondency because of mistakes when there are plenty of more pleasant sins around!
- Today I am quieter than water and funnier than grass.
- And yet, I didn’t manage to break all the decency today.
- Wisdom is not about not making mistakes, but about not repeating them.
Descriptions of news and other recent events
Watching the news these days can be just as stressful as talking to an angry boss. Our final TOP “Cool catchphrases about modern life” will provide you with invaluable help in decompressing:
- On election day, people cast ballots.
- Also say that Lenin was a skinhead!
- The main thing is to win. After all, the winners will not be imprisoned.
- Walking at night is the easiest way to commit suicide.
- Debauchery is any sex in which you are not involved.
- The longer I think, the more convinced I am that Eve not only ate the forbidden apple, but also made a fashionable bag out of the poor Snake.
- If I'm on a plane, I'll choose a seat in the front. If the plane crashes, the beer cart will pass by me again! At least I'll get drunk before I die.
- It seems that rare steaks of the second group will soon become the most common dish.
- Driver, beware of places where children can suddenly jump out!
- Psychoanalysis is the brain's efforts to obtain pleasure intended for another organ.
A little more about the benefits and expressions in everyday life
If the article on the topic “Cool expressions for any occasion” motivates at least someone not to resort to various chemical doping just to cope with the negative effects of stress, then it was not written in vain.
Of course, constant stress is an unpleasant thing, but you can and should learn to cope with it without medication. Is it difficult? Not really. It will be difficult only at the very beginning. These difficulties can especially affect those who have already become dependent on some chemical substances.
If we are talking about drug addiction or advanced alcoholism, in order to overcome the addiction, you will most likely have to consult a narcologist.
However, most readers do not fall into this demographic. This means you can train your own mind to successfully cope with stress. To achieve this goal without serious difficulties, you need to learn how to switch from what upsets you to the exact opposite moments. It won't be long before you notice that achieving this goal is not difficult at all. The main thing here is not to let yourself get wound up!
After all, if someone from your environment behaves rudely, it is his problem, not yours. Why waste your energy on other people's problems? And even if you were wrong: what will the hassle and bitter tears give? Isn't it better to just draw the right conclusions and not repeat past missteps and mistakes?
The media will rain down a barrage of negative news on us in an endless stream. And what does this give? Will there be fewer wars? Will planes stop crashing? Will all drivers and pedestrians learn to obey traffic rules? Unfortunately, all these questions can be considered rhetorical. Therefore, you still shouldn’t worry too much about everything that the media brings down on us. Let's live in harmony with our nervous system. And constant stress has never prolonged anyone’s health!
Therefore, the only thing that can really help us is the correct attitude towards everything that happens both in the world around us and directly in our lives. It is easier to endure any difficulties in a calm state of mind. And the best helpers in the constant fight against stress, apathy, depression and constant fear are ourselves. The ability to control your own consciousness, to have cool phrases and expressions in stock is one of the types of positive survival.
Continue to look at your life with a smile, endure difficulties with a cool head and notice the positive aspects in any situation. And most importantly - stop worrying about trifles! Life loves those who take it easy! And then everything in your life will be just wonderful!
A selection of the best positive quotes and sayings about life, for every day, about love and mood, in pictures and funny. Statuses about positive people.
Positive quotes for every day
Appreciate those who put aside their pride for you, who always forgave and always waited; fate provides you with such people only once.
Evaluate the day by the evening, and life by the end. (D. Herbert)
Aim for the Moon... because even if you miss, you will land on one of the stars. (Les Brown)
Let all the negativity pass through your fingers, and then only joy will remain in your palms!
Best Positive Quotes Funny
Looking for a woman? ...better look for money. The woman will find you herself.
At the hairdresser: “I want to get my head in order.” Hairdresser: “This is not for us, the psychiatrist is in the house opposite!”
You sit on Odnoklassniki all day, press exit and they ask you: “What, are you leaving? So fast? And somehow it becomes funny.
It's good when it's good! Otherwise it's disgusting.
Well, okay, the bear stepped on my ear, but it looks like he slept with you.
Have you learned how to kiss on tomatoes and think you're ready for life? Buy bananas.
For everything to come out well in the end, it must first go in well.
Positive statuses and quotes
Think about something else, your thoughts can be seen through your pants.
What year were you born? In what month? What date?... And what the hell?
Never doubt your attractiveness! Remember: scales lie, people are jealous, and the mirror is generally crooked!
My family is strange: dad talks to his car, mom with flowers, sister with cats, I’m the only normal one - with a computer and phone.
And where??? - the gynecologist asked the mermaid...
The most useless struggle is the struggle between the heart and the mind. After all, often a completely different part of the body wins.
Everything fell into place - according to the Indian horoscope, I am a deer.
Want to change your gait? Don't drink TEA, but drink VODKA!
Positive quotes in pictures
Positive thoughts, quotes about life with meaning.
Life is the art of drawing comforting conclusions from disappointing premises. (Butler Samuel)
To reach the goal, you have to walk. (Honoré de Balzac)
Wherever you can live, you can live well! (Aurelius Marcus Antoninus)
Fate is fate, but the choice is yours!
You cannot take one huge step that will immediately ensure you achieve your desired goal. For any necessary goal is achieved through many small and quite ordinary steps. (Peter Cohen)
Positive Quotes About Love
“Chaste is the one whom no one desired.” (Ovid)
If someone else likes your beloved woman, this is not a reason for jealousy. So you made the right choice. This is a reason to be proud - someone’s dream is in your hands!
Why do you always fall in love with someone who can get along without you?
I spent the night with him, got some sleep... in general, I realized - not my thing...
Late love may not have the passion inherent in twenty-somethings. But she has such a depth of feeling that young people never dreamed of.
In a relationship, you need to give so much freedom that the person himself wants to be with you more and more often. Love is when you don’t hold a person, but always give them the right to choose...
Only when you fall in love at first sight do you realize how short-sighted you are.
Positive thinking and attitude - quotes.
God, give me wisdom to understand a man, Love to forgive him, Patience to withstand... Just don’t give me strength, otherwise I’ll kill him!!!
I’m at a great age: the nonsense has already worn off, I’m still far from insanity! This is not about me))) I haven’t gotten over it))) insanity will come - but the place is occupied...
Remember this simple phrase, everything will happen, but not right away!!!
Don't be afraid of change. Most often they happen exactly at the moment when they are needed.
“You should only marry someone who has beauty!” - The cheerful young man noticed...
But the sad one answered him like this: “You should take the ugly girl as your wife. It won’t be scary to lose.”
And the third was prudent... He said this: “I’ll marry a smart one...”.
An old man walking by said to them: “YOU NEED TO MARRY YOUR LOVE!!!”
Don't tempt fate - she may not be able to bear the torture...
As one comedian put it, you need to be able to laugh at yourself, and why not smile at the funny statements of other people. Laughter is important for human health and morale. It prolongs life, promotes a positive perception of events, and shows that you definitely shouldn’t be discouraged in any situation. Let's dive into a whole list of funny sayings that may be useful for expanding your vocabulary.
Sometimes one short sentence can lift your mood for the whole day. People often say the funniest phrases without thinking. That's why they turn out to be incredibly funny.
Here are ten phrases that can make you smile and make you think.
- The son of an avid poker player cannot understand whether his father loves him or not.
- A small group of smart climbers have circumnavigated Mount Everest. – It’s not for nothing that they say that a smart person doesn’t go uphill.
- Recently my wife said: “We are not close enough for me to weigh myself in front of you!”
- Wisdom does not always come with age; sometimes old age comes alone.
- When a compliment doesn’t make you happy: “Darling, there is no woman better than you! Yesterday I was convinced of this again!”
- Modern world: There is no more tragic story in the world than the one about the lost Internet.
- A little about education: a diploma allows you to make mistakes much more confidently.
- An optimist is confident that he lives in the best of all worlds. The pessimist is afraid that this is true. – What does a realist do?
- Born yourself - help another. – A very effective motto of China.
- Don't be afraid to do what you don't know how to do. The main thing to remember is that the ark was built by an amateur, while professionals built the Titanic.
Funny phrases from films
A great way to cheer up is to watch a good movie. Let's remember the funny moments from Soviet and other films.
- Here I am walking beautifully along the street, and the men around me are falling and falling... And they themselves are stacked in piles! (Film “Girls”).
- Either aristocrats or degenerates drink champagne in the morning! ("The Diamond Arm")
- If a woman asks for something, you must give it to her. Otherwise she will take it herself. (“The Man from the Boulevard des Capucines”).
- Make a mysterious face, fool! ("Heart of a Dog")
- Well, citizens are alcoholics, hooligans, parasites... Who wants to work today? (“Operation Y and other adventures of Shurik”).
- I have no time to look after. You are attractive, I am damn attractive. Why waste time? I'm waiting at midnight. (“An Ordinary Miracle”).
- - How did you end up in the Spanish monastery?
- I took it for a brothel. Easy to confuse. ("Pirates of the Caribbean")
- You dream of playing as a striker, but they use you as a ball. ("Taxi")
- - If I were your wife, I would leave too. - If you were my wife, I would hang myself! (“Ivan Vasilyevich is changing his profession”).
- - Who writes? - Anonymous. - God gave me a surname. (“Queen of the Gas Station”)
Funny phrases to cheer you up
The main thing is to maintain a positive attitude. Here are a few phrases that will come in handy at a time when the mood does not want to rise at all, people only upset, things fall, and wages do not grow.
- A little philosophy: The attitude towards others depends greatly on why they surrounded you.
- We describe our state correctly: I’m in such a good mood today that I can’t say it in a fairy tale or formulate it with obscenities.
- Who said that laziness cannot be combined with a rebellious spirit: I lie on the couch all day and nothing can stop me, because I have no brakes!
- Always go towards your dreams. Tired of walking? Then crawl. No strength to crawl? Feel free to lie down and lie in the direction of your dreams.
- Why did you decide that I am vindictive? I have a very bad memory, I have to write everything down.
- It is believed that the color orange can improve your mood. Tip: Scatter five thousand dollar bills throughout the house. Great mood guaranteed!
- I came to work in no mood. She ruined it for everyone. I sit and smile.
- When even a vacation in the garden is perceived with humor: And everywhere I went. I didn’t go to the Maldives, I didn’t go to Cyprus, I didn’t even go to Greece. I'm thinking about where to go this year.
- Everyone has a hobby. Some people collect stamps, others collect ship models. My husband has been assembling a wardrobe from Ikea for three years.
- Even if I fall face first into the mud, it will be healing.
Funny phrases for conversation
Let's expand our vocabulary with funny expressions.
- I was about to leave, but then they poured it again.– There is always a reason to stay.
- We don’t need someone else’s, but we will definitely take ours, no matter whose it is.– How to stupefy your interlocutor.
- I would look at you forever - through an optical sight.- But sincerely and sincerely.
- I don't know how it should be, but you're doing it wrong. – A very relevant phrase.
- Being bitten by mosquitoes, he fell into the sin of foul language.- A witty explanation.
- I'm not slow - I just think smoothly.- Not a bad excuse
- Why do I need a waist? I'm married now.- Really.
- Tell me, should I help you or not interfere?
- If your conscience torments you at night, try sleeping during the day.
Hitting on girls funny phrases
- Girl, help me. I bought pasta, but I have no idea what to do with it (if I answered with advice, then I add: “Can I always consult with you?”).
- Girl, how much is your smile worth? I would love to buy one!
- Would you like me to give you a ride on the escalator?
- You obviously don't like men. To be honest, me too.
- What do you think a nice man should say to a nice girl when he meets him on the street, so as not to be rejected?
- I have amnesia - haven’t I approached you yet?
- Can you tell me what time it is? My watch suddenly went backwards.
- I collect signatures of the cutest girls. Could you put yours?
- Pretends to pick up a bill from the floor. “Girl, is this yours? Not yours? It turns out I found it! Maybe we can drink it together?”
- A man walks past the girl, then turns sharply and asks: “Didn’t you just pinch me?.. No?.. It’s a pity...”
Funny catchphrases
Phrases said precisely to the point can help you get ready and lift your spirits even in the most exciting moment. Some words describe what is happening so vividly that you want to include them in your vocabulary and delight people with the sharpness of your own expressions.
Phrases from the resilient actress Faina Ranevskaya:
- “If a patient wants to live, then medicine is powerless”
- “Loneliness is when there is a telephone in the house and the alarm clock rings”
- “Sclerosis cannot be cured, but it can be forgotten.”
What are V.S.’s performances worth? Chernomyrdin, who created new themes for parodists:
- “We will live badly, but not for long.”
Chaplin on women:
- “A woman can make any billionaire man a millionaire.”
Mikhail Zadornov about life:
- “The most harmful thing is life. Everyone dies from it."
- “They lived happily ever after until they met each other!”
Mark Twain on important matters:
- “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.”
From the film “Moscow Doesn’t Believe in Tears”
- “Sometimes you hear such nonsense, but it turns out to be a point of view”
- “Don’t teach me, better help me financially.”
Funny phrases of children
Children are spontaneous, open to everything new, they have a vivid imagination, which sometimes surprises adults. A small child and older children can easily find a non-standard answer in any situation, and their philosophical thoughts make them not only smile, but also think.
How to ask for what you really want:
- - Ma-a-am, I’m thirsty. Just not milk... and not tea... Compote. Or juice. Or better yet, chocolate!
Children's friendship:
- I ask my five-year-old son:
- Dima, do you have a friend Vova?
- Yes.
- Doesn’t he offend anyone in kindergarten?
- Mom, we offend together. We're best friends!
- - Mom, can I go for a walk?
- With this hole in the tights?
- No, with Svetka from the third floor.
Cunning:
- - Mom, let's get a brother or sister. Dad won’t even notice, he’s always at work anyway.
Children need to be surprised:
- My daughter got stuck to the rattles in the store.
Mother says:
- Let's go to another department. Maybe there is something more interesting there.
The daughter answers:
- Okay, surprise me.
From the Unified State Exam essay in social studies:
- If you can’t live in society, the only thing left to do is live with a girl.
When a child asks smart questions:
- “Mom, why did you teach me to talk and walk, and now you make me sit silently?”
Excerpts from essays on Russian language and literature:
- “He lived with the horse for twenty years...”
- “At first the geese swam smoothly, and then they began to make movements under the lambada. This is the last dance."
- “Today’s marriages are like the union of a tick and a dog. But the situation is worsened by the fact that usually there are two ticks and not a single dog in a marriage.”
Funny short birthday phrases
Toasts are often made on birthdays. Long toasts are not always perceived by ear, especially if they are too serious. Therefore, you can please your guests with funny short toasts and wishes.
- Let's drink to your coffin, dear friend. A coffin that will be made from a hundred-year-old oak tree that has not yet been planted.
- In ancient times, or not very long ago. or maybe it was a long time ago. Okay... Lived... or maybe lived... Doesn't matter! Let's drink to the birthday boy!
- A little arithmetic: a dacha is “0”, a car and a garage are “0”, an apartment is “0”, money is “0”, health is “1”. Let's drink to the fact that the life of our birthday boy will consist of one unit and then many, many zeros.
- Nature in each of the people rises either as grains or as weeds. This toast is for watering the first and tearing out the second. Let's drink, friends, to the birthday boy who managed to grow a beautiful garden within himself!
- D Let's drink to the hadron collider, and to the fact that in an hour no one will be able to utter this word.
- There is no need to run after a woman like after a runaway bus. Remember that the next bus is behind you.
Let's drink to ensuring that buses run as often as possible! - A streak of failure often turns out to be an upswing.
Here's to our joyful prospects on this runway! - Let's drink so that you have everything and you have nothing for it!
- Dear friend, I wish you always have a light heart and heavy pockets!
Funny phrases of wishes
- I wish your whole life to be dirty and dark...
Let the money be like dirt, and happiness makes your eyes darken. - Buddy,
Remember, we will always come to your rescue...
And the more revenue, the better!
- I wish you to have everything in this life: both expected pleasures and pleasant surprises!
- Today is your birthday,
This means you need to have a blast!
After all, you will have a whole year,
To have time to recover a little!
- You say “hello” to me!
And I say “hello!” to you.
It’s great that we both say hello!
- Congratulations, my “old stick”! I wish you incredible fun, love without boundaries and health like a horse!
- I would like to wish you a very modest life. For a car without a roof, only old wine, and blue cheese.
- Congratulations! Live without enemies and without horns, have success and dreams without interference.
- Friend, on your holiday I feel like a Bedouin in the desert who has not seen water... I really want to drink!
- Let's drink to the birthday girl, in whose honor such wonderful, cheerful, worthy and modest people like us have gathered!
Funny phrases from cartoons
And now funny phrases from your favorite cartoon characters.
- “Where it’s flabby, there’s tenderness!” (Kung Fu Panda)
- Good advice: “Never say: “I was mistaken,” rather say, “Wow, how interesting it turned out!” (Ice age)
- - So where is this damn creature?
- Inside. Waiting for us to save her.
- No, I'm talking about the dragon (Shrek)
- – As they say – leave your ass in the past!
- No, leave the past behind you! (Timon and Pumbaa)
- “If the cabin depressurizes, put on an oxygen mask so that other passengers do not see the horror on your face...” (Madagascar)
- “You made me dress up as a modest rabbit, and chose a bright and beautiful suit for yourself. This is not comradely" (Kopatych from the cartoon "Smeshariki")
- “Well, who leaves a child alone at the skating rink? what if I break and fall” (Masha and the Bear).
- - Mr. Krabs, but I had a dream!
- So what? And I had kidney stones. Time heals everything, my boy (SpongeBob).
- “Who, for example, is the ultimate king here? No one? So I’ll be the first!” (Last year's snow fell)
- “The right company is the kind of company where they will treat me to something and listen to my Grumpy with pleasure.” (Winnie the Pooh)
Odessa funny phrases
Learning to joke sparklingly when communicating and always find a witty answer to any question is a great art. Odessa humor is distinguished by its uniqueness and the fact that it is born precisely in the course of conversations. That's why it's so lively and diverse. Let's look at the humor in the dialogues of Odessa residents, who can incredibly quickly find original answers to any questions.
- Self-irony:
- Faina, describe your appearance.
- You can get used to it...
- - Syoma, do you love your wife?
- Certainly! Why is she worse than others? - The main thing is persistence:
- Syoma, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go through it again? - A reminder in the toilet in one Jewish family: “Don’t just sit there, think about something.”
- Marriage:
- Do you agree to take Faina as your wife?
- Do you have better options? - “God protects those who are careful,” thought the bride when he ran out of paste in his pen during the marriage registration.
- Grandma really liked Skype.
- No, look how useful this thing is! It’s like there are guests, but there’s no need to feed them.
- - Darling, you and I have only been married for the first day, and we’re already about to quarrel...
- I’ve been waiting for this day for two years! - - Benya, I still promise you that in six years we will live better than in this Europe!
- Why will this happen to them?
- A little Odessa hospitality:
- Oh, dears, come again! It’s so good without you later!
Funny phrases in pictures
Funny phrases for a guy
To please your beloved one, you can send him a funny message. Let's see what girls write to their husbands and fiancés.
- Dear, I don’t know how to tell you this...So, I took a test today...and it turns out we are a perfect match!
- I want you and me to have more in common. Let's get a kitten!
- Yesterday I accidentally caught the bride's bouquet. Is there something you want to tell me?
- Dear, I’m late because I’ve been looking for my broom for a long time.
- Don't be afraid of your desires, be afraid of mine!
- You are a treacherous homewrecker, why did you break up the couple? I can't find my second sock.
- Please help me find information! Look on the Internet how to tell your loved one that I scratched the car and still get a new phone for his birthday.
- She parked the horse, defeated the monster and cooked it for dinner. I'm sitting and waiting for you, my prince!
- Darling! The girls and I decided to have a drink. I will definitely call. Don't pick up the phone.
- Darling, I am incredibly happy for you! After all, you married so well.
Funny phrases with meaning
Phrases that not only sound funny, but also contain a certain meaning and life truth.
- Attention! On a slippery porch, the number of cultured people is halved!
- The genius in me is fast asleep. But a fool never sleeps!
- In order not to accidentally call his wife by the name of his mistress Anastasia, the husband took the cat and named it Nastya.
- Wife: Let's buy a car, I'll learn to drive, at least we'll see the world! Husband: which light - this one or that one?
- Sappers do not understand the phrase: we must learn from our mistakes.
- Wife to husband: I'm not going to accept you for who you are. I'm not a military registration and enlistment office!
- Why do I look great in the mirror, but the camera shows the opposite?
- Money is not the main thing. The main thing is their quantity.
- How to get a girl to like you: you need to be strong, handsome, rich or just a cat.
- About the alcoholic feast: at first it was good, then even better, then so good that it’s still bad!
Funny phrases with names
Funny phrases for girls
These phrases can not only make a girl smile, but also tease her. They should be used with caution.
- Girl, you have very beautiful legs! One is more beautiful than the other.
- I want to invite you to dinner and breakfast at the same time.
- You are so beautiful that it’s scary to look at!
- Girl, do you believe in love with the first person you meet? I'm ready to be him.
- Can you help me go left? (Dangerous phrase when dating).
- On the bus:
I can’t reach the handrail, I’ll hold on to you. - In the elevator:
Girl, aren't you scared of being stuck in an elevator with a maniac like me? - You have a very predatory look, you are probably hungry.
- You are so beautiful that you don't need makeup. Leave it a little though.
- You believe in love at first sight. No? Perhaps I'll come by again.
Funny phrases that will make you cry
- Relevant for online correspondence:
Write a little louder, I can't hear you here. - Great people lived so little! Something is not going well with me today.
- I'm ready to do anything for money. Even go to work.
- My wife is very good. Others are even worse.
- So much has been written about the dangers of smoking that I firmly decided not to read any more.
- Optimism is just a lack of information.
- I tried to drown my problems in cognac, but they surfaced.
- The girl decided to take revenge on the guy and married him.
- A first-grade student came to the New Year party dressed as a squirrel, which greatly frightened the security guard Mikhail.
- The tale of the sleeping beauty once again shows that there is always a person who will wake you up.
Funny phrases that rhyme
Funny phrases about work
Even work should be taken with humor. Here are a few phrases that can cheer up colleagues in the middle of the work week.
- I almost live at work. And wages are only decreasing. Probably deducted for accommodation.
- If a girl suddenly becomes silent, it means she wants to say something.
- You can't trust a woman who doesn't hide her weight. She won't hesitate to say anything.
- The smarter a woman is, the more stupid things she does.
- A man chases a woman for so long until she catches him herself.
- You can interrupt a woman with impunity only with a compliment.
- If men knew what women were thinking, they would behave more confidently.
- Real men always achieve what women want from them.
- Women forgive their men, even if they are not to blame for anything.
- Women still know how to keep secrets. However, they do it together.
- A girl can tell her friend for several hours that she has no words.
I love working in a team. It's easy to blame others.
Funny phrases about women
Finally, funny and wise expressions about the fair half of humanity.
Each of us feels sad sometimes. The day is not going well, everything is falling out of hand, or a bad streak has come. At such moments, encouraging phrases can lift the mood a little. And sometimes we ourselves see people who need it. But it’s not always possible to quickly find the right words. Well, it won't hurt to remember a few phrases. This might come in handy someday.
For motivation
Encouraging phrases often help to perk up. A person needs motivation to do something. If you give up, you don’t want to touch work and your only desire is to lie on the bed in front of the TV and wrap yourself in a blanket, it’s time to remember the thoughtful phrases of famous people.
Nick Vujicic, an Australian writer, said: “When faced with difficulties, you cannot give up and run away. You need to assess the situation, start looking for a solution and not lose faith that everything that happens is for the better. Patience is the key to victory."
The American philosopher is known for a shorter but no less truthful phrase. He argued that there should be no boundaries for people.
And the 25th President of the United States assured that as soon as a person believes that he can do anything, half the way has already been passed.
For determination
Encouraging phrases often help you get down to business. William Clement Stone, businessman and author of self-help books, said that a clear goal is the first step to any achievement. Christopher Columbus, who discovered America, liked to assure that a person would never cross the ocean if he was afraid of losing sight of the shore.
Farrah Gray, a famous businessman, investor and journalist, said that you should not be afraid to pursue your dreams. Otherwise, there is a high risk of being hired to fulfill someone else's desires. And William James, an American philosopher and psychologist of the 19th century, was sure that in the human subconscious there is hidden a force that can turn the whole world upside down. Encouraging phrases like this inspire thoughtful thought and action, and that's worth recognizing.
To lift your spirits
Words really can mean a lot. And it’s quite possible to cheer someone up with a phrase on a working day, even if it hasn’t gone well in the morning. Norma Jean Monterson (better known as Marilyn Monroe) once said these words: “Smile. After all, life is the most beautiful thing in the world. And there are plenty of reasons to smile.” After such words, you involuntarily think and realize that the actress was right.
But sometimes the sayings of celebrities sound like preaching. In this case, humorous phrases will come to the rescue. There is nothing better to cheer someone up. You can say: “If things can’t get any worse, then it’s time to start enjoying the prospect!” This expression will at least make a person smile. We can also say that a positive plus is always found, even in the most negative minus. And this, by the way, is a fact.
Important to know
Sometimes our loved ones have problems in life. The mood rushes into the abyss, and it becomes painful to look at a loved one. And it is difficult to find the right expression that could demonstrate one’s attitude and feelings towards the situation. Girls are especially often interested in how to encourage a man with words. Phrases cannot be universal; everything depends on a particular situation. But in any case, declarations of love will at least slightly lift the mood. They are never superfluous.
When a person feels bad, the best thing a loved one can do is to demonstrate their feelings and thereby show care.
Funny expressions
Continuing the theme of humor, we can note other positive phrases. In some situations, you can cheer up a loved one with the following expression: “The hardest thing in this life is the blue whale. And the rest is nonsense! Another person will definitely smile after this phrase: “When your affairs are going badly, it’s better not to go with them.”
Is a person gnawed by conscience for a hectic vacation and doing nothing? And this happens. Then this instructive but cheerful phrase for him: “Time spent with pleasure is not considered lost.”
These words can also be classified as smart but positive expressions: “The best teacher in life is experience. True, he charges a little dearly, but he explains it clearly.” You can't argue with that.
Motivation in a foreign language
Finally, it is worth noting the encouraging phrases in English. They are more concise than ours. Perhaps everyone knows the phrase “Why not?” And it translates like this: “Why not?” But really! Why not? Many people who make this or that decision can be prompted to action by this very phrase. Because in context it translates as: “What do you actually have to lose?” And to follow up this phrase you can send: “It"s worth a shot!” Which translates to: “It’s worth it!”
Americans also often say the following phrase: “What are you waiting for?” Translated, it means: “What are you waiting for?” And the phrase “What do you have to lose?”, by the way, is translated as: “What do you have to lose?” It should be noted that many foreign expressions aimed at motivating the interlocutor are constructed in interrogative form. Why? Because a sad/doubting person, having received a question from his interlocutor, subconsciously begins to think and find the right solution to a particular situation. And he understands that his opponent is right.
But there are also more artistic expressions. For example, these: “Never give up!” (never give up), “It"s totally up to you!” (it all depends on you), “Follow your dreams” (follow your dreams), etc. Finding the right words for a drooping friend can indeed be difficult, but by expanding your stock of expressions, it will be easier.